I don’t ask people their preferred pronouns. I ask them how they would like to be addressed. If they want to tell me their pronouns that’s the opening.
Though I agree with you in spirit, I don’t understand what you mean by mandatory. Do you mean it in the sense that if the right pronoun isn’t used, the speaker will be ignored? Are you talking about legislation that makes it mandatory and the state will impose punishment? Who is making it mandatory and how? In what jurisdiction?
To use a pronoun that someone doesn’t like would be extremely rude an offensive. If you mean it is verbally violent, I’d agree. The insinuation there, I guess, is that damages could be claimed for intentional harm or it would justify retaliation with verbal violence in self-defense. I hope you agree it does not justify physical violence in self-defense.
I tried the video link but it was blocked. Maybe that would clarify.