Jayne, thanks for responding. You’ve said a lot here. I’m not trying to confront you. I’m just trying to understand the argument for why the term “cis” is offensive. If you convince me it is, I won’t use it and encourage others not to.
To your point that there is no qualifier needed: We use qualifiers all the time. Tall man. Blond women. But, in the case of cis-women vs trans-women, are you just saying that there is no such thing as trans-women? That is, trans-women don’t exist. They are men pretending to be women or something like that. This is my inference from the first statement.
On the point about women not being non-men. Just logically, if one does not below to the set men, that person is a non-man. Just as a person who does not below to the set women is a non-women. That’s just math. Why would anyone be offended if they are called a non-man if they are a women or non-women if they are a man, other than it sounds pretty awkward. In my experience, I don’t see women getting called non-men a lot anyway, so it is getting off the topic of using the term cis.
That men think they can set themselves as the human paradigm is a bit confusing to me. Are you referring to patriarchy? Not sure how that is related to use of the term cis, so I won’t go there.
On gender roles, you say no one is fine with their gender roles. Really? I’d say a large part, if not the vast majority of people are happy with the gender roles. Certainly, some aren’t and probably many would like to see some things change (including me), but it isn’t that no one is fine with it the way it is. And good for the people who want to change things, in my view. I don’t like seeing roles imposed on anyone. But what does FGM have to do with the use of the word cis? And, I never said what my idea of how women should be is, so not sure what you are accusing me of.
Good point about birth assignment. I agree the term is misused, just as you describe. Cis is what we use to mean when the observed sexual characteristics don’t match the person’s perception of themselves. It’s just a term. So someone with male sexual characteristics but presents as a women is trans. Everyone else is cis. I’m not interested in discussing whether this person is really a women right now.
I’m also not trying to validate anyone’s identity. You’re reading more into my question than I am asking. I’m curious how you think it is clear that I am. I’m not interpreting the meaning of the term cis. Its definition is well documented. How does the term define boundaries and identities? It is just a term for an identity that exists, whether we use the term or not. Obviously, there are people who present as a different gender from their sex. You may hate them, but they do exist. If you aren’t one of them and someone calls you cis-women, why do you hate the term so much? Why does it carry all the feminist baggage? I’m a cis-man and that term does not offend me at all. I just see it as a short-hand for “a man who identifies in society consistent with his sexual characteristics” and that’s all. It’s sure is easier to use “cis”.
If you give me the courtesy of a response, please stick to the use of the term “cis”. I’m not trying to have a debate about TERF issues with trans-men or patriarchy or anything else.